tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post1918365525704339025..comments2024-01-20T00:00:10.459-08:00Comments on Mudblood Catholic: The Dazzling Web of Homoerotic DesireGabriel Blanchardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17607504369762849930noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-86763736491065871682015-08-20T19:22:24.485-07:002015-08-20T19:22:24.485-07:00Thank you in turn for your kindness!
I'll hav...Thank you in turn for your kindness!<br /><br />I'll have to re-read C.S. Lewis' writings on this, but unless I'm mistaken he mentioned something along those lines. I'm not sure though is what we've experienced is eros though. It's transporting, but do such instances necessarily (or even generally) fall into that category? I'm not even certain if I can describe them as Romantic (and no, not just 'romantic'). Of course, I most likely am mistaken. Perhaps my experience of eros/the Romantic has a lesser degree (or differs in aspects) of passion than is commonly described. As such I greatly appreciate being able to discuss this with you.orual's kindredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10397611004208043438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-50592008595056373862015-08-20T14:01:01.438-07:002015-08-20T14:01:01.438-07:00Thank you for your prayers and kind words (and ple...Thank you for your prayers and kind words (and please accept my assurance that you've said nothing presumptuous). There may well be common threads in our experience -- I can hardly imagine what it's like to be a heterosexual woman, so I hesitate to say how much, but still. I can say that I've sometimes had those venerative feelings about women myself; which is one reason I think there's more to eros than sexual attraction, requited or not.Gabriel Blanchardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17607504369762849930noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-40561643732861212142015-08-20T04:36:36.526-07:002015-08-20T04:36:36.526-07:00Before I proceed, please permit me to admit that I...Before I proceed, please permit me to admit that I'm a Catholic girl--well, woman technically--who happens to be straight and most definitely not a theologian. I am deeply ignorant, and for this I apologize. This line, however, <em>Seeing a beautiful man doesn't just get me going sexually; it's awe-inspiring, even humbling -- it evokes joy and glory and gratitude, not just arousal, still less objectification.</em> is something that I think I've experienced with some women. Your likening it to veneration I think is especially apt. <br /><br />Now, since I am straight, I have different questions to ask myself: is this because my own features are significantly less than ideal? Is this (if only in part) comming from some deep kind of insecurity? I simply do not think that I am not straight or in denial. Yet in reading your post, I think perhaps there is some commonalities between your experiences and mine. There may be something which, perhaps, might shed some light on both our struggles, and I'm wondering.<br /><br />I hope this is not presumptuous. I beg your forgiveness if it has appeared as such. Please know that I find your witness deeply humbling, I wish you the utmost best, and you are in my prayers.orual's kindredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10397611004208043438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-25587975468234623532015-08-19T07:13:08.163-07:002015-08-19T07:13:08.163-07:00Wow Gabriel, this is a poignant and beautiful post...Wow Gabriel, this is a poignant and beautiful post. You are in my prayers and all others who struggle with their own issues. I've had issues with the Church on sexuality too and I'm a straight married woman. I really don't have anything else to say other than this is a very good post :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14835221526063413606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-71485621201158727062015-08-19T04:16:19.387-07:002015-08-19T04:16:19.387-07:00I'm not really clear what in this post prompte...I'm not really clear what in this post prompted these remarks, but regardless, I'd like to clear up a couple misunderstandings, or miscommunications on my part, that seem to be involved.<br /><br />To begin with, I don't in any way intend to *promote* the lather-rinse-repeat cycle of which you speak. (I am, thank God, not a pastor, so -- though I'm certainly responsible for what I write -- I am at least free of that awful responsibility.) I agree with you in considering a committed relationship preferable to binging and purging, even if I don't consider either one a moral ideal. I think it's morally better to stick to one person, and it's certainly a lot safer.<br /><br />Now, I frankly admit that I *do* binge and purge, partly because I haven't found such a relationship; but saying so is me being honest, not me advocating the way I live to anybody else. I couldn't, in conscience, advocate my own lifestyle to others even as a compromise.<br /><br />I would also allow that there may be people who, for one reason or another, cannot countenance a relationship, but are still imperfect in their practice of celibacy. For them, and (presumably) for a season, lathering, rinsing, and repeating may be the only way they can live. And this isn't unique to sexual sin or imperfection; it is the way of all human life. This, incidentally, is one reason that -- ever since I first heard it -- I've rejected Yoda's dictum completely. Do or do not, certainly; but you do by trying. There is literally no other possible way of doing anything than by making an attempt. And sometimes, in trying, you find out that your first (or your fiftieth) attempt isn't adequate to achieve the intended result. That too is human life. And, insofar as that person's determination to go back and try again is prompted by courage and hope (as opposed to being an expression of mere pigheaded self-righteousness or abject terror), I wouldn't be at all surprised if they were far holier than I. That doesn't mean I recommend their course, but I don't wish to judge their consciences.Gabriel Blanchardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17607504369762849930noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-41626830543256137242015-08-18T16:26:43.105-07:002015-08-18T16:26:43.105-07:00It is the greatest act of spiritual abuse on the p...It is the greatest act of spiritual abuse on the part of conservative Catholic pastors and apologists to promote in any way the "later, rinse, repeat" cycle of sinning on Friday, confessing on Saturday, and going to Mass on Sunday.<br /><br />To think that a "shabby attempt at celibacy" (as Yoda says, "There is no Try") is somehow better than a committed relationship is just spiritually schizophrenic.<br /><br />What? Because Evelyn Waugh wrote that awful (and awfully naive) thing about "putting sin to sleep at night"? I'm sorry, but the theologically incoherent model of winking at sin but being very stern about "living in sin" (such a wrong concept) is a pastoral disaster, and it's shameful that you promote it as in any way admirable or implied by Catholic teaching.<br /><br />There is NOTHING better about that cycle than about a committed relationship. The sex is just as sinful either way, and probably just as frequent (indeed, paradoxically, you might find it actually decreases over time in the committed relationship. I don't mean in months, I mean in decades, which is the scale on which spiritual growth happens).<br /><br />The lack of commitment (ie, the ability to bear this very spiritually harmful cognitive dissonance by "disavowing" the sin "in between," more or less delusionally or with more or less self-deception) makes it WORSE, not better. Jelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01607822575954711599noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-60929220327863986562015-08-18T15:17:18.255-07:002015-08-18T15:17:18.255-07:00Hi. I've been dipping in and out of your blog ...Hi. I've been dipping in and out of your blog for a while now, and have really enjoyed your insights as I work out my own feelings on Church teaching and sexuality (for what it's worth, I'm straight and a cradle Catholic). I read your (excellent) post on Julie Rodgers just not too long ago and later watched these clips of Andrew Sullivan discussing the same issues (they really should be required viewing for Christians concerned about "persecution" from gay activists). Together they've raised a point in my mind which I'm sure you get asked about constantly, so please bear with me. It strikes me that, no matter how genuinely kind, sensitive and loving someone might be when expounding a traditional view of sexuality, it still has the power to hurt and alienate. <br /><br />Basically, whilst the efforts of some on both sides of the debate to behave more charitably are commendable, there is nonetheless an impasse which can perhaps only really be overcome in close personal relationships where people love one another unconditionally and can thus agree to differ (and even then, I know of a friendship which broke down in part due to one party - acting, I'm sure, from the best possible motives - encouraging the other to attend Courage meetings, which unfortunately only resulted in their feeling judged and attacked - I imagine stories like this are not uncommon). Your post on Julie Rodgers suggested that gay Christians often reject Church teaching primarily due to the bullying and marginalisation they've experienced. I don't doubt that, but I imagine it's also linked to their natural and understandable wish for love and companionship. As I'm sure you appreciate far better than I ever could, ultimately if traditional teaching was presented in a more attractive way all round, and gay people were consistently treated with genuine love and respect, they would nonetheless still be told - albeit more politely - that to act on their desires would be sinful and they could thus never hope to enjoy an intimate sexual relationship. Any thoughts on how to get past this difficulty? (Sorry for the essay! And I realise this is kind of considered in this blogpost anyway...) <br />https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTfcxoif7RU&feature=youtu.be<br />https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZ-FPDMaMCAClarehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13925578482209862693noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-2502456394380844572015-08-18T15:15:17.620-07:002015-08-18T15:15:17.620-07:00Hi! I've been dipping in and out of your blog ...Hi! I've been dipping in and out of your blog for a while now, and have really enjoyed your insights as I work out my own feelings on Church teaching and sexuality (for what it's worth, I'm straight and a cradle Catholic). I read your post on Julie Rodgers just not too long ago and later watched the clips I linked of Andrew Sullivan discussing the same issues (they really should be required viewing for Christians concerned about "persecution" from gay activists). Together they've raised a point in my mind which I'm sure you get asked about constantly, so please bear with me. It strikes me that, no matter how genuinely kind, sensitive and loving someone might be when expounding a traditional view of sexuality, it still has the power to hurt and alienate. <br /><br />Basically, whilst the efforts of some on both sides of the debate to behave more charitably are commendable, there is nonetheless an impasse which can perhaps only really be overcome in close personal relationships where people love one another unconditionally and can thus agree to differ (and even then, I know of a friendship which broke down in part due to one party - acting, I'm sure, from the best of motives - encouraging the other to attend Courage meetings, which unfortunately only resulted in their feeling judged and attacked - I imagine stories like this are sadly not uncommon). Your post on Julie Rodgers suggested that gay Christians often reject Church teaching primarily due to the bullying and marginalisation they've experienced. I don't doubt that, but I imagine it's also linked to their natural and understandable wish for love and companionship. As I'm sure you appreciate far better than I ever could, ultimately if traditional teaching was presented in a more attractive way all round, and gay people were consistently treated with genuine love and respect, they would nonetheless still be told - albeit more politely - that to act on their desires would be sinful and they could thus never hope to enjoy an intimate sexual relationship. Any thoughts on how to get past this difficulty? (Sorry for the essay! Plus I realise this is already considered somwhat in this latest blogpost...) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTfcxoif7RU&feature=youtu.be<br />https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZ-FPDMaMCAClarehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13925578482209862693noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-48367644313310881722015-08-17T17:46:26.867-07:002015-08-17T17:46:26.867-07:00Thank you Gabe for sharing these thoughts. You ha...Thank you Gabe for sharing these thoughts. You have summed up, quite succinctly, many of my thoughts and struggles. Though you are further along in your journey than I, it is my belief that I will be where you are someday soon. The loneliness that you speak of is my greatest fear and while I've been unattached, so to speak, for most of my life, that doesn't mean that I want it forced upon me. I don't want to deny the feelings and desires that God gave me (and you).<br /><br />I pray for you, for me, and for all others who are in this situation that we will find peace.Clurmanihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04796492785671867994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-89491462626884368122015-08-17T17:02:57.444-07:002015-08-17T17:02:57.444-07:00Thanks for the post, Gabriel! As usual, your writi...Thanks for the post, Gabriel! As usual, your writing brims with pathos, logos, and good snark. It is, in a sense, a salve to a heart that feels similarly bewildered -and more than a little besieged. I tend to think too much of my choice -like an Earthling Tinidril, fancying my epicness in this decision; it's terribly self-conscious stuff. And that seems, in a way, self-defeating. Celibacy remains a long road, I suppose. I'm still trying to find a nice way of telling my Id, 'Come, let us die with Him .' in the meantime, however, I am grateful for your work!<br /><br />Josh KEron y Huévenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05427858455661556321noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5766538007498037282.post-88100698614995506532015-08-17T12:09:01.015-07:002015-08-17T12:09:01.015-07:00I feel that I am in exactly the same boat as you a...I feel that I am in exactly the same boat as you are, Gabriel. To embark on a voyage which I did not choose to take is all the more difficult for me, yet to see that my pilot is Christ gives me a sense of comfort and trust. Still, it does not mean that I am fully pleased. The seas buckle and turn the vessel, water splashes in and the sun burns my skin. I feel pain and discomfort, yet still this is my only hope, and to abandon ship and climb into a flimsy lifeboat will only take me to my doom. Maybe it is not the best vessel, but it is one nonetheless that shall test me and purge me, as fire does to purify metal.<br /><br />Christ knows my pleas and prayers: Why am I given a sexuality that does not fulfil the full expression of sexuality as a whole as heterosexuality? Why do you, O God of Love, ask me to give up what so many desire and seek in this world - what I desire? Earthly love may seem nothing compared to divine love, but it is nonetheless undeniably powerful. <br /><br />Loneliness is what I fear most of all. It is the current state that I feel myself in. I have had an interest in some men. The first simply dwindled away as time went by, the second turned into a good friendship, but the third has left me weeping in my pillow in the dead of night. If flowers grew from tears, my pillow would have grown a beautiful flowerbed. <br /><br />There's more that I wish to say, but I believe this is enough for one comment. Take care, dear Gabriel. You are in my prayers. I truly am grateful for what you write. You give a lot of my thoughts tangible words which I can see and read coherently, rather than have them muddle my head. I look forward to your posts. God bless you, dearest brother in Christ.<br /><br />Peace and prayers,<br />An avid reader of your blog from the Isle of MaltaLepus0594https://www.blogger.com/profile/10522720784641205343noreply@blogger.com